Must-have cookbooks this holiday season by @notalogin


  • Paula Deen’s Really Sorry Party Favorites. Put a happy face on a bad situation with original recipes combining white rice, peeled cucumbers, milk, cream, butter (if it’s not too yellow), white flour, salt, sugar (not the brown stuff, obviously), sour cream, mayo, and tartar sauce.
  • 23 Recipes Which Are Too Complicated To Make, with a Stunning Cover. The cover is beautiful, a real masterpiece of food photography, and all by itself is more than worth the very reasonable price of $48.95. The actual recipes all involve like 80 steps and seven pots. You’ll try making one of them only to get halfway though and discover you need African saffron and you only have Spanish saffron and note 73 specifically warns you not to substitute. Every guest will pick it up, leaf through it, and be super impressed.
  • The Pigskin Cookbook. Kinda misleading, actually, you’d expect it to be tailgating recipes, but it’s actually written by some guys from Atlanta with over-styled mustaches who decided pork skin is the next big thing in Incomprehensible Nouveau Southern Cuisine. That said, the pork-belly and pork skin chili is amazing tailgate food.
  • If You Are Not Cooking with Quinoa You Are Fucking Missing Out. Groundbreaking recipes that will revolutionize the way you think about quinoa, and don’t even try to tell us you don’t think about quinoa. You think about quinoa all the time. You think about how fucked-up the pronunciation is. How delicious it is with some craisins and maybe a few herbs. Actually, forget the quinoa, just eat the craisins straight out of the bag.
  • More Like Breaking Mmm-Mmm-Good. I don’t know, some recipes based on how they ‘cook’ meth on Breaking Bad. I’m literally the last person on the planet who didn’t watch the show, you figure it out. No spoilers.
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