Stieg Larson Continues to Criticize From Grave by @thenatewolf

Receiving unprompted criticism is a part of life for any child of a baby boomer but few have had to deal with the amount that Elizabeth Larson, daughter of Swedish author Stieg Larson, has.

 

“Ever since I can remember my dad was a controlling and judgmental prick,” said Elizabeth Larson, when asked about her relationship with her father. “He sent me to private school after I scraped my knee the first time, he tried to have three of my boyfriends hung for treason, and he insisted on cutting my hair until I was 22 years old. Since childhood he had groomed me to be a lawyer but when I decided to get my masters in electrical engineering instead of going to law school he told me I was ‘going to die from a drug overdose in a sex gutter.’ To be honest, I was glad when he died, I was finally free of his judgment… or so I thought.”

 

It wasn’t until after the untimely scowling accident that took Stieg Larson’s life that his “Millennium Trilogy” of novels were released with: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Girl Who Played with Fire, and The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets’ Nest. The books were universally praised as gritty and realistic and many credited his time as an investigative journalist as the inspiration for the stories.

 

“I knew immediately what this was really all about,” said Elizabeth, revealing a small and tasteful tattoo of a Chinese dragon on her shoulder-blade. “Like all parental criticism this isn’t exactly subtle. I mean the titular character is named Lisbeth,” said Elizabeth.

 

Stieg had originally envisioned the series spanning ten novels that would have included:

-The Girl Who Threw Her Future Away

-The Girl Who Spat In Her Parents’ Faces

-The Girl Who Needed to Grow The Hell Up

-The Girl Who Got A Serious Reality Check

-The Girl Who Didn’t Care About Anything But Herself

-The Girl Who Used To Be So Promising

-The Girl Who Was Dreaming If She Thought Her Dad Was Going To Keep Paying Her Cellphone Bill

 

Stieg’s widow confirms her daughter’s suspicions.

 

“It was just like him to pull some passive aggressive b.s like this,” said Babar Larson, when asked about her daughter’s claims. “You should see the notes and outlines for the other novels in the series. He actually uses the real names of her old boyfriends in the working copies.”

 

With the incredible success of the novels, publishers are scrambling to find and sell Larson’s other unheralded novels including:

The Wife Who Was Too Snippy

The Cousin Who Owed Me $1500

and

The Husband Who Asked “Are You Going To Change?”

 

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