The Week in Sports by @murrman5

 

brent

Welcome to my corner of this website. First, I want you to know I am by no means a writer, but I am a sports fan and just like everyone else, I have a ton of opinions. My goal for this section is to make it as interactive as possible. I will be answering your questions, reading your opinions, replying to comments and hopefully doing it all in a humorous way. So, let’s get to it and take a look at this week in the world of sports

DEREK JETER PLAYS FINAL GAME AS A YANKEE

Derek Jeter wrapped up his 20 year career this week, playing his final game, as the New York Yankees failed to qualify for the post season. He leaves behind a reputation as a professional and quite the ladies’ man. He will be a first bid Hall of Famer in a few years, making the Hall of Fame the only thing he hasn’t been able to get into right away

LEBRON JAMES SHARING THE SPOTLIGHT

LeBron James stated this week that “this is Kyrie’s team” and that he’s sharing the spotlight. When asked what Kyrie’s last name was, the 2 time champ declined comment.

KANSAS CITY ROYALS OFF TO POST SEASON

For the first time since 1985, the Kansas City Royals will be playing baseball in October and both fans are said to be “ecstatic.”

NICKI MINAJ RUMOURED FOR SUPER BOWL

In a completely made-up rumor, Nicki Minaj could be performing the halftime show at the Super Bowl this year. In attempts to land the pop superstar and her famous butt the NFL has agreed to widen the field 10 yards.

NDAMUKONG SUH

I read the headline “NDAMUKONG SUH LEAVING LIONS TO BECOME A JET?” and was immediately disappointed when they specified ”New York Jets”

MIZZOU STUNS S.CAROLINA

The University of Missouri Tigers upset South Carolina Gamecocks 21-20 in NCAA football. When asked during the postgame press conference if “think y’all should combine teams and be the Mizzou Gamecocks” head coach Steve Spurrier said “no”

LAKERS A PLAYOFF CONTENDER IN THE WEST?

Kobe Bryant thinks this team has what it takes to make the playoffs, as long as his wife says it’s ok

NFL LONDON 2014

The annual regular season game in London kicked off between Miami and Oakland this week. This year’s game has been well received by the UK fans since commentators made changes to some of the more common terms. A complete list wasn’t released but I was able to report these:

Touchdown = Holly Banger

Field Goal = Ipswich Triplets

Punter = Puntaaaaaahhh

Quarterback = 12 Pence Charlie

NBA POWER RANKINGS

  1. San Antonio Spurs ( because they’re the spurs)
  2. Chicago Bulls (Healthy Derrick Rose?)
  3. Oklahoma City Thunder (KD will have to do it)
  4. Cleveland Cavaliers (will take to the playoffs before Love and James can click)
  5. Los Angeles Clippers (not run by a racist anymore and want to prove something)
  6. Golden State Warriors (Steve Kerr will make them smarter)
  7. Portland Trailblazers (same thing as always from the blazers)
  8. Dallas Mavericks (good, but too many guys with chandler in their name)
  9. Toronto Raptors (seriously)
  10. Washington Wizards (screwed if the NBA bans wizardy)
  11. Miami Heat (core is still there)
  12. Houston Rockets (depends on Howard)
  13. Charlotte Hornets (got the name back and it reminds of Larry Johnson/Grandmama)
  14. Memphis Grizzlies (same as the trailblazers)
  15. New York Knicks (Melo resigned for a reason I guess?)
  16. Los Angeles Lakers (healthy Nash/Kobe?)
  17. Atlanta Hawks (racial issues like the clippers last year)
  18. New Orleans Pelicans (haha Pelicans)
  19. Phoenix Suns (remember Danny Majerle?)
  20. Brooklyn Nets (running on fumes)
  21. Boston Celtics (Rondo will be traded by Christmas)
  22. Minnesota Timberwolves (Loveless hahaha)
  23. Detroit Pistons (Van Gundy will squeeze wins out of so-so team)
  24. Denver Nuggets (Jim Halpert face)
  25. Indiana Pacers (*gags thinking about Georges’ leg)
  26. Sacramento Kings (more like Sacramento Not Kings)
  27. Orlando Magic (see Washington wizards)
  28. Milwaukee Bucks (boring)
  29. Utah Jazz (best player is a white guy)
  30. Philadelphia 76ers (because I had to put them on the list)

 

Thanks for reading, please send some questions, comments and replies that I can answer for next week’s column to murrman5@hotmail.com

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