It’s the first Thursday of the month you know what the fuck that means. It means it’s Fashion Week you buncha nerds. Fashion is so important. I can not stress enough how crucial fashion is in our lives as human beings. Now pay attention as I, Karl, lay down some mad fashion statements for you, the beloved reader.
Let’s talk pants: everybody wears them, everybody “needs” them, everybody loves a good pair of ol fashioned regular ol pants. But people are blind. People are sheep, they have no drive, they are plagued by laziness & rot in their brains. Pants can be so much more than just pants. Pants can be so much more than you could have ever imagined.
As your fashion consultant it is my job to give you proper fashion advice with a twang of curiosity & a delicious aura that catches the eye of all around you. So here’s your damn fashion advice for the week: Pants On The Head. Sounds crazy doesn’t it ? Of course it does. It’s supposed to be crazy, crazy is what drives the fashion world. Put those fucking pants on your head & strut your stuffs. Work it you magnificent beast, you sculpture , you perfect creation. You have done it. You finally look good. Put the pants on your head.
(Pants on The Head.)
Tune in next Fashion Week , always guaranteed to spice up your looks & leave you appearing simply magnificent.
– Dr. Karl Bergholz, Professional Fashion Consultant