Extra In A Porn by @bethany_white8

“You watch Gotham last night?” my coworker Greg asks casually, pouring himself a lukewarm cup of Joe from the office coffee maker. “I know it sounds like a dumb show,” he continues, “but it’s not half-bad once you’re a few episodes in.”

“You know, I keep meaning to watch it but I can never remember when it’s on. I mostly just watch stuff online anyway,” I reply as I stir my own coffee.

“YOU MUST BE STRESSED FROM ALL THE BUSINESS YOU’VE BEEN DOING, MAYBE THERE’S SOMETHING I COULD DO TO…RELIEVE THE TENSION.”

“I think Gotham is actually on Netflix, the old season anyway. The thing about Gotham is that it really explores the origins of the classic Batman villains, which kind of creates richer characters than what you see in the Batman films,” Greg continues.

“I WANT TO FUCK YOU WITH MY BIG BUSINESS COCK UP AGAINST THE FILE CABINET”

“OHH YEEAAAHHH FILE IT UNDER ‘G’ FOR GIANT DICK”

“Oh, is the show like a prequel to the Christopher Nolan Batman trilogy?” I ask, feigning interest.

OHHH YEAAHHH PUT YOUR BIG BUSINESSMAN COCK INSIDE ME”

“No, no, no, they’re totally different things; they’re only related through the shared characters of the Batman universe.” Greg launches into an explanation, prompting a sigh from me. “What I like about Gotham,” he continues, “is that the main character is Jim Gordon, you know the police guy? So he kind of offers a more human perspective on the whole thing.”

THAT’S RIGHT I’M THE BOSS, THE BIG BOSS.”

“OOOHHH GOD, OH GOD I WANT TO PUT YOUR BUSINESS DICK IN MY MOUTH, THE MOUTH I USE TO ANSWER THE PHONES”

“Wait but isn’t Batman human?” I reply. “I thought that was the whole theme of the Nolan trilogy, like how he tried to be more than human but in the end his humanity was the best thing about him?”

*SUSTAINED MOANING, FUCKING*

“Well I mean I guess if you want to marginalize it that way, I personally think it was more about the general darkness of humanity and-“ Greg is mercifully cut off by the director.

“CUT! EXTRAS I’M GONNA NEED YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT GOTHAM IT’S FUCKING UP THE SOUND! BIG JIM, DESTINY, CINNAMON: YOU GUYS WERE PERFECT. STELLA I’M GONNA NEED YOU TO LOOK A LITTLE MORE ENTHUSIASTIC WHILE BIG JIM’S DICK IS IN YOUR MOUTH. LET’S TAKE IT FROM THE TOP EVERYONE!”

9 TO 5 INCHES: SCENE 12, TAKE 2.”

As Greg and I resume our places, I whisper “You know I’m never gonna watch Gotham, right?”

“ACTION!”

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